‘I choose not to talk badly about their father’: Mel Bala on co-parenting after divorce from Zwai

Renowned radio personality Melanie Bala recently opened up about life after divorce and navigating co-parenting with her ex-husband, musician Zwai Bala.

In 2017, Melanie and Zwai issued a joint statement announcing the end of their nearly 10-year marriage.

They had tied the knot in 2008 and share two children — a son and a daughter — who were aged 10 and six at the time of the split.

During a recent interview on Relebogile Mabotja’s Podcast, Melanie spoke about the journey leading up to the divorce and how they have managed to maintain a healthy co-parenting dynamic.

“Divorce is not an overnight decision… In that process leading up to making the final decision to get a divorce, I think there is a part of you that starts to let go… A lot of grieving happens through that process.

“And it’s the beginning of a different journey because, how do I navigate life without this person that I’ve been with for such a long time? You’re going to make mistakes. You’re going to mess up, but you give yourself grace to figure it out,” she said.

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Melanie on co-parenting

Melanie emphasised that when children are involved, separation is not easy.

She said breaking the news of their divorce to the children was also difficult.

“To them, it very much came as a surprise… My son was upset, obviously, and then my daughter was upset after that. It’s not a nice conversation to have, but we did it together. We sat them down and told them.”

She added that she and Zwai make co-parenting work because they always put their children first.

“These kids didn’t ask for this. And so I choose not to make them have to pick sides, or talk badly about their father, or cut off their entire family that they’ve known their whole lives.

“I feel like co-parenting works if the two people no longer have feelings for each other, or if you don’t hate each other. When all those feelings are resolved, you can truly co-parent. It really works when you are emotionally mature, and you have truly ended and completed that part of your relationship, so that you are only co-parents.”

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