How to stop being a 20 seconds man: Tips to stop early ejaculation

Disappointing your partner is never a nice feeling, even more so when she is let down between the sheets.

According to the American Urological Association, premature ejaculation is the most common type of sexual dysfunction in men, with about one in five men – between the ages of 18 and 59 – having reported incidences of premature ejaculation.

What is premature ejaculation?

Dr Heather Blaylock, a Medical Doctor with a special interest in Sexual Medicine explains that premature ejaculation is defined as a male sexual dysfunction where ejaculation occurs within about one minute of penetration and the inability to delay ejaculation on all or nearly all penetrations.

This, she adds, not only adds stress to a couple’s relationship, but can also lead to partners avoiding intimacy.

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Why can’t some men control ejaculation?

There are several factors that can play a role in premature ejaculation, including:

• Anxiety about performance
• Guilty feelings
• Depression
• Stress
• Relationship problems
• Erectile dysfunction

Can premature ejaculation be cured?

Dr Blaylock says treatment options have been limited and are not always successful.

“We need to focus on the individual’s psychological wellbeing, decrease the couple issues and distress by increasing the individual’s control,” she explains.

She adds that decreasing distress will increase self-esteem and sexual confidence.

Tips to prevent premature ejaculation:

These strategies can help you to last a little longer between the sheets:

• Start-stop technique. This method involves stimulating the penis until just before you reach orgasm and then stopping until the urge to climax goes away. This process should be repeated several times to give your body a chance to recognise the phase of sexual arousal that precedes orgasm.
• The pause-squeeze technique. This method is very similar to the one above, but in this instance, you or your partner should squeeze the end of your penis where the head joins the shaft for several seconds until the urge to ejaculate passes.
• Masturbating before you have sex.
• While sex is an intimate moment between couples, distracting thoughts can also help to delay ejaculation.
• Wearing multiple condoms can decrease the sensitivity, which can also help delay climax.
• Doing regular pelvic floor exercises can strengthen your pelvic floor muscles which helps to control ejaculation.
• Trying alternate sex positions that prevents vigorous penetration can also help to prevent early climax.

ALSO SEE: The ultimate sex positions for common problems, increased intimacy

New device to make sex last longer

The ‘in2’ device, developed by Virility Medical was launched at the European Sexual Medicine Conference in Rotterdam last week.

The device will help to control ejaculation with the application of electrical stimulation.

“During intercourse the pelvic muscles contract rhythmically and the application of electrical stimulation can produce a sustained contraction, limiting the normal rhythmic contractions and make the sex last longer by postponing ejaculation,” says Dr Blaylock.

“The device is small, single use, disposable and discreet. It is placed on a trimmed perineum and activated by pressing on the battery. The battery should last fifteen minutes, and the devices come in two intensity choices. It feels like a TENS low intensity zing.”

While the device is not available in South Africa yet, it is a silver lining around a dark cloud for men who struggle with premature ejaculation.