Welcome to motherhood

Does it mean that I always know what to do and how to do it? Does it mean I am always organised and on time? Or does it mean I am always late and in a semi-chaotic state?

Am I doing too much or too little for my kids? Do I co-sleep or let them cry it out? Do I start with cereal or vegetables as a solid food? Do I send them to a playgroup, keep them at home or send them to school? Am I selfish for keeping them at home? Am I selfish for sending them to school? Do I use disposable nappies or go all organic?

Oh, and somewhere along all this chaotic thought I remember that I have a husband or partner as well that I love and miss at the same time… oh yes, and a dog, a hamster and probably a dead fish somewhere in a bowl.

Welcome to motherhood!

I think we are super critical of ourselves because the task at hand is so important and we don’t want to mess it up. But in second-guessing every little (and big) thing we do, we are missing out on some of the more important things of being a mother.

I believe that we only have them for a short time, and as we all have heard from so many other moms, “they grow up so quickly”. We truly forget the struggles of small babies but quickly get absorbed by the business and expectations (mostly assumptions on our end) of motherhood.

So, to my fellow moms out there… let’s take a step back from what we think we should be doing and from putting so much added stress to our already stressful, very critical and chaotic way of thinking, and just appreciate being a mother.

Yes, it’s hard work and time-consuming, sometimes ungrateful, but most of the time if we are truly honest with ourselves and allow ourselves the time to breathe a bit, step back and actually see our children, we will appreciate being a mother more and stop comparing ourselves to the “social media” idea of the perfect mother.

We would stop being so critical of ourselves and other mothers and just allow every mom to be the perfect mom for her children.

You don’t have to cope with someone else’s kids and they don’t have to cope with you!

Enjoy your motherhood journey… and it might sound ridiculous, but you need to remind yourself of this every day.

We need to approach this motherhood thing like a “hood of mothers” like Robin Hood: a gang of mothers with the same goal (raising children to become functional and socially acceptable human beings).

Get a chant, mantra, or whatever it takes to ground you in this journey. Do not forget the importance of (simply) being a mother in this thing called motherhood.

If you’re an expectant mommy, a 3D or 4D Scan can be a touching experience. Contact the helpful sisters at Homegrown Babies at Mopani Crossing Centre on 013 755 5500 for more information.