Citizen reporter
2 minute read
8 Sep 2021
1:43 pm

WATCH: How to keep jealousy out of your relationship

Citizen reporter

Dr Jones says that you can try to assist your partner overcome their jealousy, but most of the work needs to be done by them, on their own.

A couple at therapy. Picture: iStock

Jealousy, also known as the green-eyed monster, tends to arise in relationships, whether platonic or romantic.

Usually brought on by the insecurities of one person, if jealousy is not addressed it could lead to the downfall of a union, which could have been easily mended through proper communication and assistance from a third party, such as a therapist.

Psychologist Dr Angela Jones has spent years counselling individuals and couples who face struggles in their relationships.

Talking to Isiah Carey on the The Isiah Factor Uncensored, Jones explained that jealousy within relationships usually stemmed from partners who have personal insecurities.

“When it comes to jealousy it typically leans into insecurity and you have insecurities about yourself. So before you want to go and attack your partner or blame them for something, the first thing we have to do is look within ourselves and see what is triggering us or what is going on to make us feel that we have to compare ourselves to our partners or that we think that we are less than our partner,” said the psychologist.

Jones and Carey then went on to discuss the different types of jealousy that arise in relationships, and Jones pointed out that every type of jealousy could be linked back to how an individual is feeling about themselves in comparison to their partner.

“What is the source there? The source is what do I feel about myself in comparison to that person. If you are jealous of your partner because their career is taking off, its likely that you are not feeling that great about your career trajectory or you are insecure about what you are doing in your profession,” said Jones.

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The talk-show host then asked what one should do if they sensed that their partner was jealous of them or their career, and then Jones said you could assist your partner with their jealousy, but usually, it is a struggle that they need to overcome on their own.

Jones also said partners should give their loved ones a platform to talk about how they are feeling, and then try to come up with solutions such as therapy and counselling, to help them deal with their jealousy and issues.

“You can help them, but your help is only going to go so far because this is something they have to work out on their own. Give them a platform to talk to you about it so you can help them go to counselling and you can just sit there and support them, but it is not gonna be up to you to fix it,” said Jones.

Compiled by Lerato Maimela